Knitting a Blinky Kitten

GOODY:
I didn't know that I'd be using this space for a product endorsement, but I rarely purchase something that exceeds expectations. We have a mostly black, reprobate cat named Blinky. She sheds all the time and occasionally leaves us a regurgitated hairball in an inconvenient place. (Always the carpet, never the hardwood.) Our vet recommended a particular grooming comb called Furminator. (I keep wanting to call it a Furby; perhaps it's my medication causing these 80's flashbacks.) Anyway, the picture shows what I combed off of her this morning -- enough fur to knit a kitten, and this is the third straight day we've removed that much loose hair. I'm afraid to keep going. She might soon be naked.
GRIPE: It's a holiday. I'm going to try not to have a gripe today. Stay tuned.